Baby Ken's History
I was the youngest in a family that included two sisters a couple of years older than me. I was a bedwetter well into my teen years and wore diapers and rubber pants to bed every night from around the age of eight. Aparantly at eight years old my mother and older sisters were fed up with the dirty laundry I created most nights. I remember clearly my mother measuring my waist, ect., to make diapers and rubber pants. After a couple of days of sewing, and sending me back to a sort of hardware store a couple of times for cloth, elastic, and plastic, she was finished.
Calling me into her sewing room, she handed me diapers she had made by cutting up a mattress protector and sewing it into layers. Piled on top of the diapers were clear plastic pants she had made, and two safety pins. She handed me my "didies" as she called them, and told me to go to my room and put them on, and return when I was done. I spread out the diaper, sat on it, pulled it up between my legs, and pinned it on as best I could. I then pulled the plastic pants on, which were probably two sizes larger than they needed to be. Over these, I pulled on my pajama bottoms which really puffed out. I walked (more likely waddled) back to her room. My sisters were in their room as I walked by and quickly came out to follow me, remarking about the crackling plastic pants.
Once back in the sewing room, my mother lowered my pajama bottoms and the voluminous plastic pants and re-pinned the diapers while my sisters watched. Telling my sisters that my new didies should save on the wash, she then turned to me and said I should feel embarrassed having to wear diapers at my age and hoped that it could remain a secret. I knew that it wouldn't since my sisters had told some of my friends that I was a bedwetter when they were angry with me. To try to humiliate me further into stopping the bedwetting, my mother told me that whenever I woke in the morning with wet diapers, I was to wash the diapers and plastic pants out and hang them on the line before I went to school, and could take them down when I came home for lunch (we lived across the street from the school).
Only on one occasion (when I was around 10 or 11) did I have to wear anything to school. I dawdled one morning and didn't have time to wash out the diapers and plastic pants. In a fit of anger over my continued bedwetting, which my mother was sure I could control and was just being lazy, she told me to go upstairs and put on the plastic pants over my underwear. I pleaded with her not to make me do that but she insisted. I pulled the wet diapers from inside the plastic pants (I used to just pull the diapers and plastic pants off without unpinning them) and pulled the plastic pants back on over my underwear, and then pulled my pants on.
When I returned downstairs, I went to the kitchen to get my books and leave. As I was laeving with my sisters, my mother called me over and told me to pull down my pants so she could check to make sure I had the plastic pants on. My sisters laughed at me when they saw what I was wearing. I pleaded with my mother one last time but she was insistant that I pull my pants back up and go to school dressed that way. Thankfully, they made little noise when I walked, but I was concerned that I would smell later in the day since they were still damp inside from the wet diapers. I made it through the morning okay at school, so I guessed no one noticed. Awhile before luch while changing classes I passed my sister in the hall, who said a little louder than a whisper that I smelled like I needed to be changed. She then laughed and hurried off.
When I returned home for lunch, my mother said I could take them off but would have to "restart the day" by going back to my room, putting on the still wet diapers, plastic pants, and my pajamas and returning downstairs to await further instructions. To this day I still feel a special thrill if I put on wet diapers and plastic pants. She had me remove the pajama bottoms, plastic pants, and unpin the diapers right there, get washed up, put on clean underwear and redress. I had to wash out the diapers and plastic pants and hang them on the line before returning to school. My sisters, who were on a different lunch hour, arrived home just in time to see me hanging up my didies. Like many girls do, they brought home another girl with them who saw me hanging them up. I didn't answer when she asked if they were mine. Of course my sisters had already told her about my bedwetting so she knew they were mine and was just embarrassing me as had other friends of theirs from time to time.
I wore diapers and plastic pants every night well into my teen years. It became something that was talked about only occasionally since I guess by this time it was obvious that I wasn't going to stop anytime soon. I didn't wet every night, but to be on the safe side, I preferred to wear them rather than having to wash sheets which was much harder. I was allowed to hang the diapers and plastic pants on a rack in my room to dry after a few years of haning them outside. My mother didn't make many diapers and plastic pants, about a dozen or so, during the "early years." By the time I was a teenager, the diapers and "bloomer" style plastic pants were from Sears. The plastic pants were similar to what she made, but the diapers had a plastic panel built in and weren't as comfortable as hers. Since I was earning money doing summer jobs, I had to buy my own diapers, plastic pants, and plastic to cover the mattress. My first orgasm happened when I was wearing diapers, which I'm sure has led to my fetish.
A few othe things come to mind as I write this. I also remember going to a psychiatrist because of my fighting with my sisters, because of "soiling" (I had to wear diapers during the day most of one summer becuase of this.) and the bedwetting. As a matter of fact, I avoided the draft in 1968 when I was 19 because of the psychiatrist-he was an anti-wart advocate and sent records of my sessions with him and he must have made it sound like I had the soiling and bedwetting at that time rather than two or three years earlier.
My first sensual experience that I can still recall vividly was when I was about 7. I was playing with my older brother and sister. We were playing doctors and nurses and we had decided that I would be a baby and I had put a nappy on inside my pants whilst we played, when a little while later, our mother then called for us to come downstairs for our tea. Now obviously at this point in our parent's lives, things were fairly stressed with four young children and the slightest thing could easily result in an unprovoked verbal assault on any of us. I decided it best to quickly remove the nappy from under my trousers by pulling it out. Although I did not understand at the time, the terry nappy rubbing over my genitals as I pulled it out aroused me. As I child with a baby brother, we were asked at times to help such as taking wet nappies upstairs to the bathroom. I always found this task extremely distasteful and would avoid the chore wherever possible.
There were several younger children who lived in our street who played outside with us, some of whom some were still in nappies and as you all know in the early 70's, nappies were big bulky things that were on show to everybody. Somewhere around this time, I started to wonder what it was like to wear a dirty nappy and started private experiments by lining my pants with toilet paper and poohing myself. This progressed to the point where I got hold of a proper nappy and nappy pins, I used that lined with toilet paper instead. I then went on to making improvised waterproof pants by using carrier bags with corners cut off and it was at this point that I started wetting my nappy as well.
I realised that I needed some baby rubbers to go over my nappy to do it properly. I had seen in the village wool shop that they sold them, so I finally plucked up the courage to go and buy a pair. I went into the shop and asked the lady behind the counter for a pair of baby rubbers. She asked me what size I needed. I had not thought about this one so quickly told her that they were for my two year old cousin and she gave me a pair of size medium. I paid for them then got out quickly. I then immediately went home and tried them on. Fortunately I wasn't very big and they just about fit over my nappy, but at least they were nice and tight. My nappy wetting then became my main obsession.
On one occasion when I was 11, I had decided to cycle into the next village to get my baby pants so at least I stood a better chance of not knowing anybody. I had seen through the window that they sold baby pants, so I walked into the shop and asked for two pairs of large. The lady was just serving me when my mates sister Sue appeared from round the back of the store, she saw what I was buying and jokingly asked if they were for me. I made some lame excuse about running an errand for my mom when a little girl of about 3, who was also in the shop asked if my mommy had a baby. I said that she didn't but my Aunty who was visiting did and she needed them for him. Sue took over the sale and asked how old the baby was, I told her that he was nearly four to which she replied that I would be needing a larger pair, she then showed me some extra large baby pants called Kintal and said that these were really good for older boys. I made my purchase and was about to leave when Sue whispered in my ear. She told me to look at the back of the little girls shorts which I did, she then pointed out how you could see that her nappy was just visible below the line of her shorts which it was. Sue then went on to say that she could see my nappy under my shorts in the same way, but my secret was safe with her. Fortunately Sue was a bit older than me and already left school, I didn't see her again for a long time after but it was still the first time that I ever got caught.
One day when my sister and I were out on a cycle ride, she commented that there were wet patches at the back of my legs so we stopped and she then noticed that my trousers were very bulky and soon figured that I was wearing a nappy which was obviously wet. My sister agreed to keep my secret safe for me.
I was at this point wearing a nappy pretty well all the time apart from when I was at school. I would come in from school and immediately put a nappy on whilst I was getting changed. I would then change my nappy whilst getting ready for bed and then take it off in a morning when I had my shower before school. I used to wash my nappies and rubbers in the shower as I was washing myself and then hide them on the radiator under my bath towels. By the time I got home after school, I found they were always clean and dry by using this method. My PJ's were always big enough to hide my tight fitting nappies and so I was quite willing to walk round the house dressed like that. In bed at night I would usually take my PJ's off and sleep just in my nappy as I used to get really hot.
My nightly ritual was that I would pull the covers back off myself and massage myself through my nappy until I came and then just lie there and wet as well before slipping straight into a deep sleep. Quite often I would fall asleep with covers down but always found that I had managed to pull the covers up by the next morning when my mom came in to wake me.
One night I had got into bed wearing just my nappy and rubbers. I had massaged myself until I came and was lying there wetting myself just drifting off to sleep when my mom came into my room. I just lay there frozen with fear and decided it best to pretend to be asleep. I felt as my mom came in and tucked the edges of my nappy back into my rubbers and then pull the covers over me. I was still wetting my nappy whilst she had been watching.
After this occasion, now that I realised that my mom knew, I started being a lot more daring in my nappy wearing. I started to wear more bulky nappies under my running shorts during the day whilst hanging around at home, knowing full well that my nappy was quite visible. Quite often I would lie on the settee watching TV in a deliberate position such that my nappy was on full show under my shorts, but still my mom never said a word.
One weekend I was in the house on my own, I was watching TV and had just filled my nappy when mom came home unexpectedly. I knew that I had gone too far now and was going to get it, when mom just turned round to me as casual as you like and said she wanted me to go somewhere with her but it smelled like I needed to go and change my nappy first.
I just stood shocked at what she had just said. My mom just smiled and asked who I thought had been washing and drying my nappies for me. She said that she didn't mind as I obviously needed them to keep the bed dry at night but she would like me to see the doctor. The doctor referred me to see a sexual psychologist who told me straight that she had never heard of anything like this before. She tried me on relaxation therapy and asked me to think of nasty things every time I masturbated in a nappy and then to think of nice things when I masturbated over girlie mags. I went to see this psychologist regularly for about three months; even wearing my nappy on some visits, but decided to stop, as it was making no difference to my nappy regime. My mom agreed with my decision and said she would see how I went on, as she did not really think it would be a problem until I was about 20 and by that point I would probably have grown out of the habit anyway.
Now that my mom new about my nappies and we had been to see the doctors, she was a bit more relaxed about it and allowed me to wear them and carried on washing my nappies for me. My mom always new when I was wearing a nappy but never got involved with it. All through this period of my life I never really had a proper girlfriend, as I was always a very shy person.
In the summer of that year we went to Canada to see my Aunt and Uncle and that was going to involve a 6-hour flight. By this time, the only time that I wasn't wearing a nappy was when I was at school and my mom knew this as well. She came up with a plan on what we were going to do. She told my brothers and sister that I had a problem with my wetting and that I would have to wear a nappy at times in order to get better. This now meant that I could openly wear my nappies around the house and also I could take them on holiday with us. Mom told she that we would have to go shopping for some special things for me before we went away.
On the morning that we were leaving my mom came into my room and woke me up. She then pulled the covers back and told me to lift up whilst slid a changing pad under me. She then took my rubbers and wet nappy off and took me into the bathroom and proceeded to give me a good thorough cleaning. Whilst she was doing this she told me that whilst we were away, that she would look after my nappy changes for me. She then told me to get out of the bath and she dried me off with a big towel. Next she took me back in to my bedroom and she was carrying a big blue bag that looked like a big handbag. Once in my bedroom she got me to lie back down on the pad and she pulled out a clean nappy from her bag and proceeded to pin it on me, followed by a new pair of baby pants which were much bigger than I had been getting myself and fit me easily. After that she then told me to finish getting dressed into the clothes that she had left out for me. Once I was dressed, I went downstairs to have my breakfast and then we were off.
When we got to the airport, we were all really excited, as it was the first time that any of us had ever been on an aeroplane. We had to wait for about two hours before we finally got on to the plane, naturally I had already wet my nappy several times by this point, that said when we did finally take off I wet again with all the excitement.
About two hours into the flight, my brothers and sister had already been to the toilet when my mom got up with her big blue bag and told me to come with her. We went off down towards the back of the plane and into one of the toilets. Mom sat down on the toilet seat lid and pulled my trousers down to check my nappy. Rightly so she had guessed that I was wet and pulled my rubbers down and unpinned my nappy that which she put inside a small polythene bag from a dispenser roll on the wall. Mom then wiped me down with a wet tissue and rubbed some baby lotion around my bottom and between my legs. Mom then pulled out a white rectangle thing covered in plastic from another dispenser and opened it up, she told me it was a disposable nappy and its what they use in Canada. Mom then pulled it up between my legs and fastened it shut with some tapes on either side. It made a funny crinkling noise whenever I moved but it felt quite comfy. I pulled my rubbers back up over my nappy and then pulled my trousers up as well, you could still tell that I was wearing a nappy but not so obvious as my terry nappies.
In Canada was just great. My uncle and aunt had three children, two boys, Simon and David and the youngest was a girl called Sammy and she was nearly 5. We said our hellos and took our bags in and then sorted out the sleeping arrangements. They lived in quite a big house with a lot of smallish bedrooms, but even so, my mom told me that I would be sharing with Sammy. It soon became obvious why as Sammy was also wearing nappies 24/7.
Sammy and I got on really well together once we had each discovered what we had in common. I soon found out that her toilet habits were just as deliberate as mine and we both had great fun just being babies as we put it. I spent the whole two weeks just wetting and messing as I felt like it, with either my mom or my aunty changing me as required.
When I was 19 my life changed following an accident that left me unconscious for three weeks and in hospital for three months. After I had been discharged, I found myself in a wheelchair for about 3 months. It was at this point that I realised nappies and rubbers were also very convenient and I was back to wearing them 24/7. Mom did not mind, as she was just pleased to have me home. My bed was moved downstairs into the lounge so that I did not have to try and negotiate the staircase because I was still very weak and my leg and arm were both in castes. Mom even arranged for a nurse to come in and get me washed and changed each morning, whilst she was at work.
It was whilst I was in my wheelchair that I met up with and old girlfriend and we had a second brief relationship. She used to push me round some of the local pubs and I would easily get drunk. I had no worries about toilet issues, as she always made sure that I had on clean and thick nappies before taking me out. She would tease me endlessly, in private, about the bulge in my trousers and always had her hand in there playing with me whenever she got the chance. She would milk me dry on a regular basis and usually several times a night.
I suddenly found that I was a very confident person, overconfident even and was soon leaving a trail of ex-girlfriends behind me. I was always very careful to keep my baby life very secret. Then I met the girl who made my head spin and after we had been together for about two months I decided to tell her of my secret life. She was not at all impressed by what I told her and she finished our relationship about a month later. I went through a period of depression following her departure and spent most of my time staring at my beer. Then this girl in the pub started giving me lifts home and we got to chat about everything, she was a nanny who looked after three children aged between 1 and 3. On some occasions we stopped in deserted parts of town to have sex as purely a physical thing as neither of us were in a relationship. I was only wearing my nappies occasionally at this point and without even thinking one night we stopped for sex. We started all the normal kissing and cuddling with me not really thinking about what was about to happen, when she put her hands down between my legs and found my nappy. Undaunted by this she asked if baby needed his nappy changing. I was mortified but she carried on and had sex with me, then afterwards she pulled a clean nappy out of her bag pinned it on me and took me home. We carried on like this for about 4 months until I met somebody else.
3 months later when that relationship went down the tubes due to lack of comprehension and understanding, I went back to my understanding casual sex partner. I went on like this for three years and about 7 relationships until I get engaged to somebody else who said she understood me and didn't mind my wearing nappies. That is until she got pregnant and met somebody else and that relationship went spiraling down the tubes followed quickly by an abortion. Again I went back to my understanding casual sex partner and we moved in together. That lasted 3 days and she went back home because she couldn't handle the extra driving of where we had moved to and I have never seen her since.
Then I met my current partner, I told her all about myself from day one. She is three years older than me and a divorcee with a couple of disastrous relationships behind her. At first she was happy to help and did everything she could, even changing my nappy as needed. She never liked me soiling my nappies and asked me stop doing that which I did. We were soon engaged and went on holiday together camping in Wales. She let me wear nappies the whole time we were away and as I hate public toilets, she said I could use my nappy as I wished provided I changed myself straight away. Our annual camping trips have gone on like this ever since. I will wear a nappy 24/7 whilst we are on holiday and use it for everything, provided that I don't embarrass her. This means that I wet whenever I feel like it but only mess when I can go and deal with it straight away.
We have lots of friends who know that I wear nappies, one couple in particular couple that live by the sea with their now 12 year old daughter and 3-year-old son. On one occasion, I had taken the little boy to the beach by ourselves. I had received strict instructions to take his shoes and socks off if he wanted to go paddling which I did. He was soon splashing about in the water up to his knees and a couple of waves caught him up to waist height. I had been paddling with him and found a hidden trench in the sand which I stumbled into up to my waist height as well. We were not overly upset by these incidents and soon decided to return home, both pleased with the fun that we had. As we walked back down the drive of his house my wife and his mom were both in the front garden and both saw us and burst into hysterics. Unbeknown to me, we both had waterlogged nappies that were hanging nearly round our knees, even the casual observer could see that we were both wearing very wet nappies.
It was at this point in the little boys life that he was just working out what to do with clothes. He would sit there in a morning as his mom dressed him saying "trousers on", "socks on", "shirt on" and whatever else he was being dressed in. On one morning he walked in on me as I was just getting dressed and he saw me lying on the bed. He then started his familiar chant with "Gary's nappy on" as I pinned my terry nappy around my waist, "Gary's pants on" as I pulled my rubbers up over my nappy and he then went to describe every other item of clothing that I was wearing.
The following day it was raining really heavily and I had taken the daughter and her father into town and dropped them off. When I got back, in the time it took me to get out of the car and into the house, I got completely soaked. Our friend casually told me to take my wet clothes so that she could dry them for me. I tried to object but she pointed out everybody knew I was wearing nappy anyway so what was the problem. I was soon stripped down to just my nappy without another word.
How I Became an Infantilist.
First, of all my childhood was not very good. My dad abused my mom. I can remember when he used to throw things around. I think I was about 6 or 7. When they divorced after that me and my brothers would visit my dad on the weekends. Sometimes he wouldn't pick us up on the weekends or my mom would not let us go to our dad's. Our cousin came over one night and he was a betwetter, and for some reason I wanted to try his diaper but didn't ask. A couple of weeks later I made a diaper out of a plastic bag and a towel and slept in the diaper. To my surprise my mom came in that morning and got me up. I don't know if she saw my homemade diaper. I was under the covers and she didn't say anything. She left the room and I pulled off my homemade diaper and hid it in my night table and later washed the towel. We never use that towel so I kept using it once and a while. I thought I was crazy wanting to wear a diaper and I almost got caught a few times.
I stopped wearing my homemade diapers for a while when I was about 11. My older brother sexually abused me and told me if I told any one about it he would kill me. When I was 13 I skipped school and my older brother was at school. I told my mom and told her that he said that he would kill me if I told anyone. My mom phoned the police and when my older brother got home the police took him away to the police station and he admitted that he sexually abused me. He was sentenced to stay away from children and us unless we were supervised for two years. He wasn't allowed back home. He had to stay at a shelter. He apologized to me and he said he was very sorry for what he did. I accepted his apology. For the next two years we had to be with our mom or our dad when we were around him.
When I was around 14 I was starting to wear diapers again. I still thought I was crazy but I really liked it and I liked to suck on my thumb. I liked to drink out a cups made for toddlers. My younger brother caught me doing this. I was just wearing a diaper. He said "How come you're wearing a diaper?" and I said, "Because I wanted to see what it feels like." He tried it, too but he didn't like it. He never told my mom and I stopped wearing them for a long time.
I was about 16 and I made another diaper out of a garbage bag. I didn't want to get caught by mom so I stopped doing it for a long time again and I still sucked my thumb and sometime drank out of toddler cups. When I was 18 I decided to move out. I had a roommate that respected my privacy. for the first six or so months I didn't wear any diapers than started to wear them once and a while. for some reason I found some disposable adult diapers in a bag in the closet by the front door. I then took two of them about a month ago told my roommate about wanting to sleep with a diaper on. His wife had died a year ago and he said his wife liked to wear diapers even though she didn't need them. I told him that I liked to wear diapers at night because once and a while I wet the bed, but that's not true. I don't ever remember wetting the bed. I never told him that I like to act like a toddler and to play like a toddler. If I had my way I'd been diapered all the time when I'm at home. I'm too embarrassed to tell my roommate that, but I still get to wear them at night so that's fine with me.
It's a good thing I found DPF on the Internet because I thought I was going crazy and I was getting depressed and sometimes throughout my life I thought about killing myself. But now I'm not the only one who likes to wear diapers and play like a toddler.
Well, that's my story. At least I didn't end up like my little brother. He was doing drugs for about 2 or 3 years. He was stealing my money when I was not home and he got in trouble with a law a few times, but now he's straightening out. He's not stealing money anymore he stopped doing drugs as far as I know now. Sometimes he takes me out for coffee. I told my younger brother that I like to wear diapers. He was not that surprised. He said he would keep it a secret. I haven't told him that I like to act like a toddler.
I told my mom about three weeks ago that I liked to wear diapers and showed her Tommy his theory of Infantilism. She wasn't mad at all. I didn't tell her that I like to act like a toddler. I still haven't told my dad and I don't think I ever will. I haven't told my older brother. I don't really see much of my older brother anymore. I don't really like him any way. See you all happy.
My first recollection of wearing diapers goes back to age 5. My sister (14 months younger)and I were both still in cribs. I remember my dad diapering me and saying we were getting to old to wear diapers. Since my sister had to be at least 2 I figured I was 3 1/2 and still needing to wear night diapers. The truth of the matter is that I wet the bed on a regular basis until age 15. I guess my parents must have stopped the diapering soon after this because I don't remember wearing them after age 3.
When I was 7 we were going on a camping vacation in Kentucky. The day before we were leaving my sister came into my room with a smug look on her face. I asked her what she wanted. With the typical sister attitude she said that her and mom had been packing the suitcases for the trip and they had packed a diaper for me to wear at night. I couldn't believe what she had just said! I told her no way was I going to wear a diaper. She just smiled and left the room which really worried me.
We left on the trip without my parents saying anything about a diaper. I figured since they had not said anything that my sister had just made it up. It took us all day to get to Kentucky, we were meeting my dad's family for a reunion. We arrived in the evening and set up our tent and cots. I was told to go in and get ready for bed before my older brother and younger sister. I thought this was a little strange. My dad went in with me and said that mom had set my PJ's on my sleeping bag. When I opened them up I found a diaper. I couldn't believe it! My sister had been right.
The diaper was an all in one (I haven't ever found anything like it in later years) that had a cotton flannel lining with a plastic outer shell. It snapped at the waistband on both sides so there was no debate that it was a diaper. I turned to my Dad in shock and asked him if I had to wear a diaper. He said that he and mom had discussed it and decided that it was best to keep my sleeping bag and cot dry while we camped. He asked if I needed help getting it on and I said no, I didn't think so. Strangely, I don't remember the feeling putting it on the first time, I do remember my mom waking me up the next morning and asking if I had wet. I told her I wasn't sure. She pulled back the sleeping bag and said it looked like I had, she said to take the "protection" off so she could take it to the laudromat in the campground and wash it. I can't remember if I wet the diaper every night that week.
Later in the week I was told that I was going to get to sleep in the Cabin that my Grandparents were renting, they had arranged for a cot in the cabin and were allowing one Grandkid per night to sleep with them. For some reason my sister and I were told to take a bath together at the cabin and to get into our PJ's. My seven year old reasoning had figured that since I was going to sleep inside I wouldn't have to wear a diaper. Imagine my surprise when I picked up my pajamas without thinking and the diaper dropped to the floor. I quickly picked it up and folded it back in. I gave a puzzled look at my mom and she just nodded with the knowing look if yes, you have to wear the "protection.
As our bath neared the end my sister offered that I could get out first and get ready. I knew she just wanted to see me in the diaper since mom and dad always had me get ready or get up from bed with no one else in the tent. I told her that she had to get out first since she was younger. Surprisingly she did. After she had gotten out I was fooling around in the bath hoping my parents would leave and I wouldn't have to wear the diaper. My dad knocked on the door and said I had to be out and dressed in two minutes because we had to read our Bible verses before they went back to the campground. I quickly got out of the tub and dried. This time I remember how good the diaper felt against my skin after the warm bath. I seemed to be having a hard time getting it on, my penis had extended itself much farther than usual, something that I had no idea of why it was happening, I just knew it felt good!
After I got the diaper and PJ's on it finally dawned on me that for the first time I would have to go out in front of my family and grandparents while being obviously diapered. Even though this was an all-in-one diaper it must have been made thick for bedwetters, there was no denying the bulges in the front and back of my PJ's. I came out of the bathroom and moved quickly to a spot on the floor. Nobody said anything, I figured that my parents had clued in the grandparents and threatened my brother and sister. I do know that I wet the diaper that night but don't recall any other events relating to the diaper.
After the vacation my mom put the diaper in the bottom of my underwear drawer, probably as a veiled threat that if the bedwetting didn't stop I would be wearing it again. Unfortunately I was never made to wear it again, even when we would go camping. A couple of years later it disappeared out of my drawer probably because my mom was giving up on ever controlling my bedwetting.
Baby J's Story
This is my story of my life relating to my fetish for diapers.
I guess it started when I was about 3 or 4 years old. I saw this bag of diapers in the closet to the living room. Being the curious little boy I was, I want to try them on. I was potty train very really in my life, so I wasn't in diapers that long. I tried one diaper on and fell in love. I just held it there. Then I sat down and the padding that it gave was wonderful. I laid down and the next thing I knew I fell asleep.
I woke up to my mother looking down on me and telling me to get the hell out of that diaper. I was really embarrassed and stayed away from the closet for a long time. I was eventual drawn back to the closest, once again. I did the same thing this time, but just for a few seconds at most. I don't think see noticed that the diaper on top was always a little used, but I'll never know.
Eventual my sister was out of diapers and I was diaper less. I didn't really miss them, being about 5. I had better things on my mind than diapers. Nothing really happened until I had moved out of town. It was there were I became very interested in this area.
I was about 12 when I moved to the acreage. I just hit that point in life were I was growing hair in those places. I masturbated for the first time after seeing a documentary on male sexuality through the ages. It talk about how masturbation was shone a while back. So I did a little and found out that it is now medically acceptable to masturbate, since it is believed to help develop the genitalia. So I took a try at it and low and behold, I was addicted.
I just plain old masturbated for a year. Then it became boring and I needed something new. I found that I had an deep inside erg to be female. Not to go into much detail, but I basically wanted to be a female on command. I didn't like the idea of being a woman all the time, but I saw the advantage to it. Anyway, I took to the idea. My first inspiration came from those tampon commercials than never stop on TV. I went to my mothers bathroom and found a pad. At first I just placed it in my underwear, then I though, why don't I wear panties with it? So I did. Then I wanted to menstruate or something in it, the closest I could get, being a male was urine. So I did. The only problem was that a pad doesn't hold that much, which I found out the hard way.
I went back to the drawing board and came up with the idea of stuffing toilet paper in my underwear. It work great! I could pee and pee some more. This became an obsession, but an expensive one. It took 1 1/2 rolls of toilet paper to get the proper thickness. We were running out of toilet paper really fast. I also had to dispose of the used stuff. It was a messing process for me. In this process I added tampons and plastic to the equation. I was happy, for a while.
I then saw that this was getting me know were and after I plugged up the toilet one night, I gave up. It was about a month later that I saw a diaper behind some wood in are garage. I picked up this diaper and felt it. My penis was a flag pole in seconds. I knew what I had to do. So I stuffed it in my pants and ran to the bathroom. I tried the diaper around my waist and fell in love. I remembered this feeling and liked it. I kept this diaper around my waist and then hid it in my room. That night I just wore the diaper, and to make it stay on I had to use duck tape. This, when I woke up in the morning proved to destroy the diaper. I disposed of the diaper and went on with my life.
It was months later when my mother was baby sitting her friends child. He was still in diapers and there was a diaper bag at our house all the time. This baby wore a size 4 diaper and this diaper all most fit me. I of course took advantage of this situation a used a few diapers. It then came down to a lost supply of diapers and REALLY BIG SEXUAL URGE.
One day at school, one of my friends was using the school's Internet computer. I sat down watching him and he say, "Hey, watch this." He went to a pornographic web site were adults urinate on them selves. Pictures of people in wet diapers were contained on this site and although I say, "GROSS!" I was really quite happy. I got home and went to my trusty computer. I found that same site and downloaded every picture. That night I masturbated to the images of diapers adults.
I eventually found instructions on how to use towels to make diapers. I took this idea in to perspective and used old T-shirts. I was amazed. This is when I started to do my own laundry. My mother was happy. I've done this method ever since, but getting less frequent and time goes on. I then moved to a new city. Although I wished to buy actual diapers, I couldn't get the courage to do it. I still can't.
I was 15 when me and my dad moved. Since he wasn't home half the time, I had a chance to take my practice out of the room. I did this about once a week and was happy. I soon met a girl down the street with two little brothers. One of which had a bladder control problem. After getting to know her family they invited me to baby sit. I said sure. After putting the two boys to bed, I decided to look around. In my search I found a pack of pull-ups. I pondered what they were like and ended up taking one just as the parents got home. I shoved the pull-up in the back of my pants, got my pay and let. I got home and slipped in to the pull-up. It was a little small, but I didn't break it. Actually, it fit quite well. I slept in it that night. I had the best night sleep I had in a long time.
I eventually used that pull-up for good and I was tempted to get another. So I did, and did the same thing. It was then left months with no action. I was very active in a mailing list on the net and that was my fulfillment for my sexual fetish. Until my family (my mom had to stay behind for 6 months to finish her education and let my sisters finish school.) went to BC for summer holidays. I stayed behind to work at a hotel. During this time I made bet with my self while mopping a floor. If my friends came down to see me that night, I would go buy diapers the next day. Well.......... 3 of my friends showed up to talk for a bit and I was very happy. The next day I had off, so I went to Shoppers Drug mark with a lot or courage and purchased the largest size of baby diapers there. I was happy and disappointed. They worked, but didn't come close to hugging my body. I ended up only using 4 or 5 before I throw them away.
I also summed up the courage to buy a pacifier. I loved that and it did wonders for sleeping. This, I thought would lead me to buy the really thing I wanted, a fitting diaper. Something happened that changed all of that. I started to notice that little bits of infantilism were every where. My friend one day even talked about sex fetishes and the diaper one came up. When they expressed there dislike for such a fetish, I was greatly depressed. I turned away from diapers once again.
That didn't last long, since I still was on the mailing list. What's happened since then? One day I was hulling garbage to the dump and saw a package. I knew what a diaper package looked like and picked it up. In side was sanitary bed sheet things. I took this package home to find out that they really smelled. (go figure?) I took 4 of the cleanest ones and through the rest out. I perfumed the 4 in zip lock bags. 2 of them didn't work and two did. I managed to create a light diaper with one sheet. I did this twice and then ran out.
This leads me to present time. I'm currently looking for a person who talk to via e-mail or phone. If they of course live in my area. I really want some diapers, and if you would be nice enough to help me get some free or something, that would be great. My only problem is that all packages must be unmarked. I'm super paranoid about that.
I remember two times being put into diapers and plastic pants. When I was 5 my childhood friend George and I were playing at his house. He had a 2-year-old brother that was still in diapers. We used to go into his brother's room where we would find his brother's plastic pants lying on the floor. We would role-play being his mother and diaper each other. We would put on diapers and his brother's super large plastic pants, which fit very well. We would then take turns putting each other in his brother's crib. One day we were playing in his brother's room dressed in diapers and plastic pants. I was in the crib with a blanket over me. George left the room to go to the bathroom, and while he was gone his mother walked into the room with me lying in his brothers crib. His mom asked, "What are you doing?' I said, "waiting for George." She walked over to the crib and pulled back the blanket exposing my plastic pants. She grabbed the plastic pants at my waist and pulled them down my legs and off my feet. She was really mad and left the room without saying a word. George came back from the bathroom and his mom called upstairs to us and told George I had to go home.
Friday came around and George asked if I could stay over at his house. His mom called my mom and said it would be no trouble. That Friday night we played all evening and watched television. His mom made sure we had plenty of things to drink and eat. George's mom said, "you guys need to go to bed now, so go upstairs and wait for me to get you ready." We said we didn't need her help but she said, "I have a surprise for you". We took baths and when we came into George's room just in a towel there was his mother standing there smiling. George had twin beds and at the end of each bed was 2 diapers, pins and a pair of plastic pants. His mom said, "since you two like diapers so much I think you should wear them all night." She motioned for George and made him sit down on the diapers, she poured baby powder over his penis and butt. She pinned both diapers on him and then shook out the plastic pants. She put baby powder in the pants and slipped them over his ankles and up to his knees. He stood up and she pulled them up around his waist, making sure she covered his diapers. She then looked at me and said, "you're next, baby." She motioned with her index finger to come over to the bed. I walked over and sat down on the diapers she laid out. She grabbed the baby powder and rubbed it over my penis. I got a huge erection. She just smiled and lifted my legs and powdered my butt. She pulled the diapers between my legs and pinned them with precision. She looked at me and said, "I know what you like", holding up the plastic pants. Once again she poured baby powder into the plastic pants and then slipped them over my ankles. She slowly pulled them up my legs to my knees. I stood up and she pulled them around my waist again making sure my diapers were completely covered. She snapped the waist of my plastic pants and laughed. She put us in bed and as she walked out she said, "Good night babies, if you have to go to the bathroom and I know you will, use you diapers, that's what you wanted. I'm locking your bedroom door, so you have no choice."
With all the liquid we drank that night we were both wet by morning. George's mom came in that morning and said," after I change your brother I will be into change you babies." His mom walked in 10 minutes later told us to get out of bed. She walked over put her fingers between my plastic pants and my leg. She laughed and said "you're soaked." She pulled down my plastic pants and unpinned my diapers. She said, "it's time for you to go home, do I need to send home some diapers and plastic pants with you and a note for your mom? I hope you have learned your lesson." I was totally embarrassed. The bad thing was that was the worst thing she could have done. I loved it.
After about an hour and a half drive, me (12), my two brothers, Michael (9) and John (3), arrived at my Grandma's house. We were going to meet my aunt and two cousins, Joshua (11) and Kevin (13). The only problem was that I had fallen asleep on the way there, and I had wet my pants. I decided to try to hide it, but just as we were walking in the door, she noticed the wet spot on the front of my pants. "Steve, did you wet you pants on the way here?" She said it in front of everyone, and I was so embarrassed. I tried to tell her that I had just spilled Coke on it. She told me to come over to her where she lifted my shirt up, revealing that it could not have been my drink. Michael started laughing hysterically which made my cousins go ahead and let it out. "How many times are you going to do this before you grow up and are able to control your bladder like any other boy your age?" I was humiliated, but then it only got worse. She had not brought any clothes for me because we were only supposed to stay for a couple of hours. She couldn't let me stay in the wet clothes, so she started to take out one of John's diapers. "No mom, please don't make me wear one of his diapers," I pleaded. But it was no use. There in middle of everyone, she took off my pants and made me lie down to put the diaper on. She went and put my clothes in the washer and sent me on to play with the others. Of course, the teasing was relentless, but eventually they stopped and we just continued to watch TV. After another hour or so I needed to pee again, so I went to my mom and asked her to take the diaper off so I could use the bathroom. She was in middle of a conversation and told me that I seemed to like being wet, so I might as well just use the diaper. I knew better than to argue with her, so I decided to hold it. After the video that we watched we went in to get something to eat in the kitchen. While we were sitting there, I couldn't hold it any longer and I just had to let go into the diaper. When we got up, Kevin noticed that the diaper was wet. He started to laugh again, and asked my mom if he could change it. After I argued for a while she thought that that would be good to add to the punishment. So he took my little brother's diaper bag and made me go to the back room where he would change my diaper. I laid down on the bed and he untaped the diaper while everyone else just stood there watching. By now I was starting to cry as my cousin pulled the diaper down. "Oh my Gosh, his dick is smaller than yours, Josh, and he doesn't have a single hair," he said to his little brother. It was only getting worse. He put some powder on and pulled another diaper on me about the time mom came in and said that we needed to go home. I was so glad to hear those words.
It all started when I was six years old. I always had an interest in diapers but never wanted to admit it. My little brother was 2 and wore pampers; it was about 1980. The Pampers were very thick. I would examine them when my mom would ask me to get a diaper for him during his changes. I would always watch, as she would change him. My mother was going out of town on this occasion for the weekend and taking my little brother with her. I was to be left at one of her friends' house, who had two girls and a boy. He was 4 but still wore Pampers all the time. He had nothing wrong; I guess he just had a hard time potty training. I thought it was very interesting and asked him a thousand questions. I asked, "Do you feel like a baby? Are they really thick? Are you embarrassed when you get your diaper changed?" He just acted like it was just normal so I stopped asking questions. We would play and his diaper would crinkle, I couldn't keep my eyes off of it.
His sisters were older, 5 and 12. The 12 year old would check his diaper every now and then. When bedtime came around it was bath time the brother and sister got undressed and into the bath. After they were finished the twelve-year-old told them to go to the bedroom to get ready for bed. When they came into the bedroom big sis said lets get you guys in your diapers. I was amazed that they just acted like it was a normal thing. I knew he wore diapers but I didn't know she did too. she laid down on the bed and her big sis powdered her and then picked up a pamper and slid it under her bottom and pulled it up between her legs and taped it up. I was amazed and a little embarassed for her. Then the brother lay down for the same thing. Then she said, "Devon go take a bath." I went into the bathroom kind of jealous but kind of of scared, also. What if she wants me to wear a diaper to bed? Oh no!
I finished my bath and got dried off. When I walked out of the bathroom the little brother and sister were in PJs watching TV. I walked into the bedroom and noticed the baby powder and a diaper on the bed. I was so scared but also kind of of excited. Then Big sis walked in and said, "let's get you diapered for bed." I just froze, I said, "I don't wear diapers! I'm a big kid!" She said her mom wanted me to since I wasn't at home and might have an accident. Then she motioned to the bed and said, "Come on, it's okay, lay down; it will be quick."
I slowly walked over to the bed and kind of got tears in my eyes as I said, "I'm not a baby." She was very gentle as she powdered me and said, "it's okay, the other kids wear them, too." As I lay naked on my back she unfolded the Pamper and lifted my bottom up as she slid the diaper under me. It was very soft and when she pulled it up between my legs I started to cry a little. She taped it up and said, "there you go, all done."
I stood up and the diaper was so thick it made me walk funny. I put on my PJs. Then big sis said go watch TV for a while. I felt like a baby as I walked to the living room, all the crinkling and such. I sat down to watch TV and the other kids said nothing about me being in diapers. When bedtime came big sis asked if we needed our diapers changed and I said no. Off to bed we went. The next morning I woke up dry the other two were wet, big sis checked me and said I could take my diaper off if I wanted but I didn't. She changed the other two and we played all day. I never wet the diaper; at lunchtime I took it off and used the bathroom. When bedtime came it was the same routine I got diapered and went on to bed. I have always from that time been a diaper lover I would steal them and wear them whenever I got the chance. I still do every now and then.
As a boy, I was a bedwetter for several years. I was daytime trained fairly young, but had many accidents until I was about 5.
At night, I would wear thick cloth training pants, and plastic pants to try and keep the bed dry. I also had a plastic sheet on the bed. Some nights the training and plastic pants would hold it all, but many nights it didn't. I would usually put on the diaper pants just before bed, but sometimes changed and then ran around in nothing but the diaper pants for a while. I often wore the wet diapers around the house in the mornings until I had to get cleaned up and changed to go somewhere. There are lots of pictures of me in just my diaper pants on occasions like Christmas, etc. When I started going to school, I had to get up early enough to take a bath every morning so I wouldn't stink at school. This continued until I was about 11 years old.
Sometimes, when we went on trips or camping, my Mom would buy disposable diapers for me. I didn't like the idea at first, but then I discovered that I liked the way they felt on me. Mom used to put them on me (often with the whole family around), but then I learned to do it myself. As I got older it got harder to find disposables that would still fit me.
I remember not wanting to have sleepovers, because I didn't want my friends or relatives to know that I wore diapers to bed.
I remember once when I was 7 or 8 that I had to stay with my Aunt, Uncle, and Cousins one night and my parents were away. Both my male cousins in the house were also bedwetters. One of them is my age, and the other is about 2 years younger. My aunt made me wear the same as them: two pairs of thick cloth training pants and two pairs of plastic pants. I felt silly wearing such a thick diaper, since I normally didn't wear them that thick, but at least I didn't get the bed wet that night. I also thought it was gross wearing my cousins diapers (as though mine were any cleaner). When I woke the next morning, my diapers were wet and my cousins were both wet and messy.
There were many other occasions when the family slept over at relatives' houses. I don't remember any specific occasions when my other cousins saw my diapers, but I'm sure many of them did see and knew about them.
My sister and brothers never made a big deal of my diapers. I guess they just got used to it. Even my brother who is six years younger than me was "trained" before I was. There was one time when my sister's friend found out about my diapers (probably saw them when she was sleeping over). She told her little brother who was just older than me. He loved to tease me about my diapers, and especially in front of other people (like at school on the playground).
When I was 10 or 11 my parents took me to a urologist, trying to find out why I was still wetting the bed and leaving yellow spots in my daytime underwear. I suppose they were partially motivated by the fact that I was getting older and wouldn't be able to explain my diapers and/or yellow pants at scout camp, in the school gym, or with friends. The urologist did a bunch of tests (involving x-rays, catheters, and peeing in cups) and discovered that I had a slight deformity in the end of my urethra (which explained my inability to keep the daytime underwear without yellow spots). He also recommended and did a surgery to stretch my bladder. That didn't solve anything. He then arranged for an alarm that would go off in the night when my underwear got wet. I had to wear the alarm portion on my wrist (like a watch), and there were wires that went from there to sensors in my pants. When the moisture connected the 2 sensors the alarm would sound. Then I would have to get up, go upstairs and pee, cleanup, change to dry pants, and start all over again. I didn't much like being disturbed in the night, and would often just remove the sensors to turn off the noise and go back to sleep. My parents were not pleased with that, and made me sleep on the floor upstairs (close to their room and the bathroom). Then they would hear the alarm and make sure that I got up and did the whole routine, (or spank me if I didn't want to). That continued for a month or two until I was trained to get up without the alarm.
I didn't wear diapers again for many years, although I still had occasional accidents (both wet and messy).
Years later, a friend who I often go camping with suggested that adult diapers might be a good way to avoid getting out of the warm sleeping bag in the cold night. I was intrigued by the idea. I don't know if he has ever tried it, but I did. I found that I like diapers. I like the way the comfy fit, the feel of the plastic outer layer, the feeling when I pee myself, and the feel of wearing a wet diaper. I almost always wear diapers when I go camping now, as well as wearing often at work or around the house.
My wife discovered my diapers a couple months ago. She asked me why I had bought them, but then supplied her own answer when she thought about my frequent bathroom problems. She has still never seen me wear the diapers, and I haven't dared ask her to change me, but someday maybe she will.
Wet Puppy's Story
So how did I ever get wrapped up in this diaper fetish of mine? I think back as a child when my mother used to dress my brother and I in full length rubber snow pants for outside play. I fondly remember the texture and the rustle of these snow pants. They were great. I guess the feel and sound that excited me so much actually related to the true object of desire - diapers. It was at the age of 22 that I got hooked on wearing diapers. I remember the night clearly. I was living with a male roommate at the time, he was away for the week, but his Father was down for a weekend and was staying in his room. I decided to buy some disposable diapers, but was too scared to buy them in town in case someone had recognized me. I hopped in my car with money in hand and drove a few hours away to a small city where I located a pharmacy. I was anxious as hell, my mind racing and scared that maybe I would be found out. I sat in the parking lot for a while trying to pick up enough nerve to go into the store. Finally, I got out of the car. I put my cash in my right pocket, separate from my wallet...so I could reach the cash quickly and not have anyone see my ID as I open my wallet. I walked in the store, my throat was getting dry, and I was nervous as hell. I looked around, there was a number of people at the checkout. I waited for a while browsing through the birthday cards until there was no line. I walked over to the health aids area of the drugstore, the isle just happened to be visible from the pharmacist behind his counter. I could see them, Attends disposable briefs. I think that's what I wanted. I remember looking at that package countless number of times before...getting turned on by the picture of the adult diaper on the back. I eyed a trial pack of 2 briefs on the shelf, of medium size, and picked them up and proceeded to the check out. I was committed, my throat ever more dry, and getting somewhat dizzy as It struck me as to what I was doing. I walked up to the cashier, but had to wait for a moment as there was someone ahead of me. God, this was embarrassing..oh oh, a couple of teenagers were now in the lineup beside me. I could see the stare in his eyes on the package that I had in my hand. I tried to shield the lettering from those in the line but was of little use. Yes, I was next. The cashier greeted me and I nervously said hello. God, get that package in the plastic bag, please, I kept thinking. Finally, the sale was over and the lady cashier handed me the adult diapers. I did it! There was a big sigh of relief as I walked out that door. I hopped in my car and started driving home, with the package on the floor of the passengers front seat. I was getting very excited thinking about the diapers I was soon going to wear. I was a little paranoid however, thinking of what I might say to the Policeman should I ever get stopped for some reason and get asked what I might have in that plastic bag. I couldn't wait to see what the diaper looked like so I grabbed the package and opened it up just enough to see inside and put my hand in for a feel. I was even more turned on, seeing those two diapers inside. My city was getting closer, I would be home soon! I arrived home, and cautiously carried the plastic bag up to the apartment. Good, my friends father was not in. I went into my room and closed the door behind me. It was already 9:30 pm, so It was not all that odd being in bed at that time. I lay on my bed, and pulled the diaper out and took a look at it. The white, soft plastic outer lining of the diaper was much the same as a baby diaper. I teased myself a little, exploring with my mind what the diaper would feel like once it was on, groping at the diaper with my hand at the same time and hearing that all too familiar rustle. I found the instruction guide in the Attends package, and read it several times, getting turned on by the pictures within the pamphlet. I laid the diaper under my bottom, and positioned myself so that it would fit correctly. I opened the bottle of baby powder beside me and lightly sprinkled my body, those areas that would come in contact with the diaper. I pulled the top portion of the diaper between my legs, the feeling was tremendously exciting. I fastened both the top and bottom adhesives to keep the diaper in place. The diaper was on. My goodness, what a feeling. This was a mind shattering experience and very sexual. After a short period of rest, I was awakened by the opening of the apartment door. Oh oh, my mind raced. My roommates father had returned for the evening. He yelled "anybody home"?. I had to reply, so I said "yes, I'm in bed reading". After a quick knock he opened my bedroom door to say hello. God, here I am in a diaper underneath my covers talking to my roommates father! I hope the smell of the baby powder didn't raise some suspicion. After a brief chat, he said goodnight and closed the door. What a close call. I could hear him stir in the room next door; I was very paranoid so I slowly undid the adhesives to my diaper to take it off. The closeness of that diaper was now gone, it was off. I quietly wrapped the diaper up and placed it in the plastic bag and hid it underneath my laundry pile for disposal the next day. I waited till morning to shower off the baby powder...my bed sure smelled nice that evening. There you have it, my first encounter with diapers. From that point onward, diaper wearing continues to be an enjoyable experience within the privacy of my home. I consider myself a normal kinda guy with a harmless fetish, to myself and those around me. There have been bouts of diaper guilt over the years, but I have accepted them and have learned to live with this fetish. I wear diapers when I can, but sometimes go weeks without having them on. All depends on what's occupying my mind space, I tend not to wear them very often in the summer (too warm) or when I'm pre-occupied in a relationship. Maybe someday I will have an open minded boyfriend that I could spill the beans to and speak of my fetish. That second coming out process will not be easy, but knowing others out there have taken such a plunge makes the prospect more luring. Who knows. wetpuppy
The first time I remember ever wearing a diaper after being potty trained was when I was living in Virginia. I lived in some apartments with my mother and my brother. I was I think seven when this happened. I was being watched by some of my neighbors that also had two kids downstairs when I needed to go to the bathroom to pee. When I walked in I went into the wrong room and walked into the younger kid's room while everyone else was outside. I looked in the room and saw a package of diapers sitting next to the bed. So I got the bright idea to try one. I walked over took one from the package, right now I can't remember what type they were, and went into the bathroom to put it on. After that moment I was hooked. I would try to get them whenever I could. Some times I would even wear the diaper at home and to bed. I did this for about a month until I got caught in bed with a diaper by my mom. She was pissed and then made me apologize to the family taking care of me for taking diapers. And that was the last of it for about seven years.
The next time I had a diaper experience was when I was in middle school, about seventh grade. The class was going on a field trip but I was not able to go so the teacher told me to go the Special Ed. Hall to the teacher that helps students in classes. I was there and all we did was sit around and play games during the day. I asked for a pass and decided to go to the closest restroom, which was the handicap restroom. When I stepped in I thought that I was in heaven. I had been longing to wear a diaper for so long and now I was surrounded by them. I walked over to a package of depends that they had and read it carefully to see that it would fit. The first package I looked at was too big so I looked at another open one and it was the right size. I took one out and taped it up as tight as I could. And it was a great fit. I put my clothes back on and went back to the classroom a little nervous but the teacher jokingly asked if I fell into the toilet. I jokingly responded yes. So I was able to get diapers occasionally from the handicapped restroom until I was out of middle school never getting caught. And that was all I could do until I got to high school.
In high school I was not able to get diapers right away. So I was diaperless for about a year. When I was a sophomore I was able to get a job, which then allowed me to get money and I was able to buy my own diapers so I tried out many different kinds I found that I liked depends the best. I have been able to be diapered almost every time I wanted to now but now that I am doing martial arts I have less money to buy diapers so I have to be careful as to how I spend my money. A Walgreen store just opened up close to my house and they have the cheapest diapers I have found so whenever I get the chance I try to stock up on their store brand diapers. It my not be Depends but they are still very comfortable. I have actually gained enough confidence that I am starting to wear them to my kung-fu classes. I also wear them to school and nobody seems to notice or if they do they don't say anything to me.
Thanks for taking the time to read my story and if you want to chat just email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org. Have a good day and don't always stay dry; it is good to let go sometimes.
Baby Ben's story
Some info about me:
I am a 17 year old male, just had my birthday! w0oh0o!!! I like to role-play as a 2 year old baby boy. At night I like to sleep wiff my paci and teddy bear and would really like to have a crib but that isn't likely to happen, at least until I can move out :) I like to talk on IRC and can usually be found on undernet #diapers and sometimes efnet #diapers and/or #dpf. Right now I don't have a steady Internet connection and haven't had a chance to go on and talk a lot but I will be back soon. My IRC nick is always BabyBen, if you talk to someone with that nick and it isn't me I will be surprised. If you would like to talk you can always email me even if I'm not on irc.
Here is the story of how I got into Diapers and being an ABY in the first place:
Hmm I forget how old I was the first time I became interested in diapers or where the interest came from . . . I'd imagine I was eight or nine somewhere around there my aunt had recently had a baby and was visiting so while I was destroying the house or whatever I did back then I happened to see the diaper bag I don't know why but I took a diaper and hid it in my room. When I went to bed that night I tried to put the diaper on and as luck would have it my mom walked in and found me trying to put it on :( she took it from me and asked what I thought I was doing . . . diapers are for babies and I'm not a baby RIGHT? then she left the room and I could hear her telling my aunt about it. I was never confronted again about it, and lost interest as time went on then when I was about 12 or 13 I had a 3yo brother and again I thought about diapers so one day I took one to my room and hid it, that night I tried to put on the diaper and again it didn't fit. so I tried to figure out how I could get one that fit, the next day I took two and used the tapes of one to tape it to the other but it wouldn't fit around my waist still so I used some kind of tape that was in my room to tape it to my waist, this wasn't very effective as it leaked but hey . . . So the next couple weeks I just kept trying different ways to make it fit better and not leak etc. For a while I just wore diapers like that, then we moved and I decided that I wanted to try some diapers that fit so I tried to get enough courage to go to the store and buy some . . . when I finally did I also went to another store and got a paci and a bottle :) and was very happy for a while but somehow my brother (two years younger than me) found out I was wearing diapers and told my mom . . .I think I was 14 at the time Anyway I got this strange feeling that something was going to happen one night so I threw out everything and the next night my mom came in and asked why I was wearing diapers I freaked out and just kind of stood there confused about how she knew I finally said I don't know, then she asked if I wanted to talk to a shrink about it and I said "NO!!!" and told her I would stop wearing diapers and convinced myself I would also but about a month later I was wearing diapers again and being more careful about it and I did that till about a month ago. Then I got this crazy idea that if I started wetting the bed again I would get diapered . . . well it worked and I was diapered for it but I thought the doc was on to me so I stopped before I got caught again . . . The doc thought it was a miracle and mom did too but I was without diapers again :( I did have one other option, to tell my mom about being an ABY but I didn't have enough courage to actually tell her so I printed up an essay on infantilism that someone from IRC had given me (to this day I don't know who it was, but THANKS!) and left it on my desk where she would find it, sure enough the next day she was reading it. I had just woken up and she was in her room reading at the time so I stayed away half scared of her reaction to it. Finally she came in my room and said "I read your papers." She wasn't mad or anything when she said it, that was a BIG relief. As it turns out she doesn't mind me being an ABY and is glad that I am more interested in becoming a baby again than doing drugs or getting arrested :) No, she doesn't diaper me or anything like that. I would probably be embarrassed if she did but that's just me.
It all began in the winter of 1980. I was to have a babysitter stay the night with me for the first time that I could remember. My parents were going out of town for the weekend. It was a Friday evening and the doorbell rang. I was a shy kid so I kind of hid in the hallway. My mom opened the door for the babysitter. She was 14 or 15 with beautiful blonde hair and blue eyes. Her name was Anna. I was scared to meet her and I remember my mom saying, "hey, Donald, don't be a baby, and come here." I reluctantly came out to meet Anna. She was carrying a bag over her shoulder. I thought that it was her clothes and things. My parents said goodbye and left.
I was standing at the door when Anna said, "So you are a little shy." I nodded yes and walked to the couch to watch TV. She was nice and asked if I was hungry; I wasn't. Later on she was in the kitchen and said, "Come on, you need to eat." I walked in and noticed that she had made some ravioli so I sat down and ate. All seemed normal after dinner until she said, "we need to get you in the bath." Well, I could take a bath myself but she was very insistent that she help me. I kind of whined a little. Anna said, "quit acting like a toddler or I will treat you like one." I didn't have any idea what that meant but I didn't want to find out. I was very modest and when I getting undressed I tried to hide my privates but It was no use, she would not leave me alone. I again whined a little and Anna was very stern.
"You are a little boy who needs to be taken care of, I told you that if act like a baby I will treat you that way." She proceeded to bathe me and it was all I could do not to bawl. She saw the tears in my eyes and said, "its okay, baby." When I stepped out of the tub she wrapped me in a towel and carried me into my room. She then sat me on the bed and I noticed a big thick Pampers diaper and some baby powder. That was it. I busted out crying and Anna said, "it's okay, baby, we don't want you to have any accidents." I pled with her, "I am not a baby! I don't need a diaper! Please don't put that on me!"
It was no use, she had her mind made up. She said, "now lay down so we can get you in your diaper." I was terrified, I couldn't believe that this was happening. I lay down on my back and she sprinkled baby powder on me and rubbed it in as tears ran down my face. I watched as she picked the diaper up and opened it. She then grabbed my ankles and lifted my feet so she could slide the diaper under me. As she laid me on the diaper I started to cry. Anna said, "now baby, we are almost finished, it's okay.". As she pulled the diaper up between my legs I realized that it was really thick. The sound of the crinkle and the smell of baby diaper filled the air I was so embarrassed. Anna taped each side of the diaper and said, "that's a good boy."
After that I sat up on the bed and looked down at this thick diaper between my legs and couldn't believe that I was wearing a diaper. Anna then said "come on, you can come to the living room and watch some TV before bedtime". I stood up and the diaper crinkled and made me waddle. It was the most embarrassing thing ever. As I sat watching TV I saw a Pampers commercial and got really embarrassed again. Anna said, "What's wrong, baby? You look so cute in your diaper." It was all I could do not to start crying again. Later on I had to use the bathroom but Anna said, "well baby, you just need to use your baby diaper and I will change you." I couldn't, I was a big boy. Not long after that I wet my diaper. Anna picked me up and started talking baby to me, laid me down on the bed and changed my diaper. Later she tucked me in and told me that if I took my diaper off that I would be in big trouble.
The next morning came and my diaper was dry. That didn't mean anything, though. Anna kept me diapers all day and that night. On Sunday she took my diaper off finally and said that I was a good boy. When my parents got home I didn't say a word about it. I was too embarrassed. I never saw Anna again bet she left me with a great memory and diaper fetish.
I was potty trained around 6, but somehow continued liking to see other kids wearing diapers, although I at first never missed the diapers myself.
At the age of 13 I started getting into puberty, And I for some reason started going to the diaper aisle when in the stores, and I liked to look at the various brands of diapers and started dreaming about wearing them again some day, but it remained a dream, and instead I started visiting diaper sites like this.
My best friend is Tom. We are the same age and are in the same class. We have been around since we were small kids, and we have very much fun together. We also slept over by each other, until Tom suddenly stopped inviting me and turned down my invitations for him to sleep over at my place. I was very unhappy about this, because we always enjoyed those sleepovers very much. We never did any real dirty things, but... I asked Tom why he turned down my invitations, but he only answered it didn't fit in.
Last summer when we were both 14 my parents had to go away for some days and because it was a business trip I unfortunately couldn't go with them. Mom had talked with Tom's mom and she invited me to stay with them. I was very happy, but Tom didn't at all seem to like it. When going to bed the first evening Tom said I could use the bathroom first and he would go afterwards. I was a bit surprised, because earlier we had always been at the bathroom together, but I assumed he wanted some privacy. Tom was ready when I got back to his room, but I was surprised to find him wearing a sweatpant; previously we both slept in boxer briefs.
After getting into bed we for fun started fighting and wrestling, and I by accident ended up pulling down Tom's sweatpants. To my surprise I saw him wearing a diaper. Tom was totally humiliated and started crying. He told he had become a bedwetter when getting into puberty. He would probably outgrow it, but in the meantime he had to wear diapers to bed. That was why he had stopped inviting me over and turned down my invitations, and he admitted becoming horrified when his mom had invited me to stay over. I hugged him and told he was my best friend and I promised never ever to tell anybody about it.
I started asking him about the diapers, and he admitted he had started liking them, at least it was very much better than waking up in a wet bed. My heart made a big jump when Tom asked if I wanted to try one. As I had never diapered myself he had to help me doing it, and I became very excited. I liked the feeling of wearing diapers, they felt warm, soft and comfy, and I felt like a little kid again. Soon we both fell asleep.
When waking up the next morning I immediately recognized that nice feeling of the diapers, but they felt more bulky than I actually was aware of last night. Tom said good morning and asked if I had wet. I said i of course had not. Suddenly I felt tom's hand into the front of my diaper and he laughingly said that I then obviously had at least one very wet dream. I put my own hand into the diaper and noticed to my great surprise that they seemed soaked. No doubt I had wet during the night. This was totally unexpected. We had drunk some coke the night before but I usually have a good control and had not wet the bed for about 5 or 6 years. Tom noticed my concern but comforted me and said that because of the diapers no harm was done. When getting out of bed a little later I noticed that my diaper looked just as wet as Tom's, so we just pulled them off and went for a shower. This time we had no secrets any longer and went to the bathroom together.
The next night Tom didn't even ask, he just gave me a diaper and said you seem to need this. I nodded and tried to put it on, but still needed some help. During the night I woke up having to pee, but as I was on the inside of Tom and didn't want to wake him up by crawling over him I peed in the diaper. It felt so good, and I now knew I really liked diapers and wanted to start wearing them myself but knew that tomorrow my parents would be back, so then again boxer-briefs would become my pyjama-pants.
I woke up by feeling Tom putting his hand into my soaked diaper, and I put my hand into his and notice he was very wet. I felt he had an erection, and he probably also felt that I had one. Tom hugged me and said he was glad I also was a bedwetter. I told him I was not, it was probably the knowledge of wearing diapers which had made me wet.
Upon going to bed at home again I really missed the diapers, and I started wondering I have should be able to get my own ones. It took some time to fall asleep that first evening, but when finally in my sleep I was dreaming about diapers. You can probably guess what happened; when I woke up the next morning I had wet the bed. Fortunately mom was cool about it and regarded it as a single accident. She even didn't say anything when it happened some days later, but when it happened a 3rd time within less than 2 weeks she said perhaps you better start wearing some protection during night. I screamed, "yes" within myself, but pretended being sad and embarrassed.
A few days later I took the final step; I totally soaked my bed on purpose. I actually was embarrassed of having done it deliberately, but at the same time I hoped it would have some effect. I was not disappointed. When coming home from school that very day I found a pack of Attends in my room. I was so happy and excited, but pretended being humiliated. After that I have worn diapers to bed every night. I have become so used to them that I now quite often wet during my sleep without noticing. I some times but them on quite early in the evening, then it happens that I wet when chatting or playing on my computer. Tom of course like that I now also wear diapers to bed, we often stay over with each other. I think that my parents know that I like the diapers, they have often seen me in just a diaper and t-shirt in the evenings or on weekend or non-school mornings. They say nothing, except some times in the morning when they think it is time to change out of the wet diapers.
I also some time wet my pants, so about 1-2 times a month. Some times it is real accidents, but often I am too busy doing things to go home or behind some trees to pee. Tom also pees his pants, but that is more seldom, about 4-5 times a year. We consider starting wearing diapers when being at concerts, movies, watching sports-games etc. that must be more convenient than running for the rest room and miss some great happenings.
Diapers are cool!
My history by Mitch
My first diaper memories were around age 11. I was fascinated by my baby cousin's diapers and would steal diapers from my aunt's house. I would hide them under my bed and try them out when I was alone. These were the old style thick disposables.
When I was around age 16, I finally got the courage to purchase some Attends briefs. These were great as they actually fit me. I loved the way they felt and the sound the diapers made as I walked around.
When I was 18, my mom found some used Attends in the trash can in my room. She asked me why there were used diapers and I said because of my hernia (I had a old hernia that had never been fixed). My mom and dad were really worried and scheduled me into surgery. (After my surgery, I should have played it up and worn them during recovery. My mom may have even changed them for me!) After the surgery, I stopped wearing diapers for awhile, but could not overcome the urge to wear them again.
When I went away for college, I was not wearing them regularly. Until one time when I was about 20 years old, I purchased a bag of Attends and wore them during my 5 hour return drive to my school. I had a hard time trying to hide them because of roommates. One of my roommates friends was snooping in my closet and found a diaper! He teased me about wearing Depends, but I brushed it off. My relationship with my roommates was never the same.
After graduating college, I started working at a remote field station. During the winter, I lived alone and was able to wear diapers as much as I wanted, which was 24/7.
I got married at age 23, and my wife did not know I wore diapers. After about 6 months, we moved into a house. As I was moving heavy furniture, I wet my pants on purpose. After that, I would often come home with wet pants after work, and wet on the weekends. Eventually, she found a diaper in the trash and asked me about it. I said it was to control the wetting. She was not happy and we started marriage counseling. I continued to wear diapers and she would help me with them, but hated it. She helped me pin my nighttime cloth diapers on, and a few times helped me tape on a disposable diaper. We finally were able to talk openly about my diapers.
I stopped wearing diapers for awhile, but since the birth of our new son, I have started wearing diapers (Depends briefs) again. The diapers make me feel so secure and comfortable. Since my wife is changing baby diapers so much, maybe she could change me too.
My history by KC
When I was about 5 years old I decided to try on one of my sister's diapers and I actually got one on and wore it for the night. The next morning I woke up I looked under the covers and I was missing my pajama bottoms, only a dry diaper, but I knew I had wet myself before I went to sleep, but now I was dry. When my mom came in and told me that she found out this morning I was in a wet diaper, so while I was sleeping she changed me and now I was to wear diapers for the whole day.
During the day I was to wear them, not use them, so I was outside playing and I had to pee, so I rushed and I tripped and fell in the grass and the impact made me pee myself, so I went back inside and told my mom. I was changed out of the diaper and spanked and made to wear diapers for the whole week.
After that I was off diapers for a little while until one day I was about 8 years old I was looking around and found some old diapers. I put one on and wore it all day until bath time. My mom came in took off my clothes and saw I had a diaper on, so she spanked me, washed me and put me in a new diaper, and she fed me a bottle. I was to wear diapers for a month so that stopped altogether until I was 12. I was bored, so I went into the bathroom took a towel and folded it up and put it on under my clothes and sat there. I pulled out my penis and started to masturbate and then took my penis, stuck it back into the towel before I ejaculated and I cummed all over the inside if the towel. At that time my mom opened the door to the bathroom. I forgot to lock it and she saw me sitting there on the toilet with my pants bulging and she asked, "What am I wearing under my pants?" She came over, pulled down the zipper and saw it was a towel. She flipped and I was told to take off the towel, and when I did she looked at it, and there was cum all over it. She made me take off all of my clothes and she spanked me like over 200 times and she placed a fresh diaper on me and gave me a shirt. We went out and bought some diapers for me that could actually fit like Attends size extra small, so we went home and she made me wear them now and forever. Every chance I get I masturbate in my diapers and she doesn't care anymore, so now I'm totally dependent to diapers, so I wear them all of the time.
My history by Josh
One Saturday, my family and I went to a wedding in San Jose, California. When we got there, I noticed that my cousins Nick, and Chris were there. So we played, and when we were about to leave, my aunt asked me if I wanted to sleep over their house. So I said yes. At that time I was 11.
When we went to his house, we started to play video games. When it was time for bed, I went to get my pj's on. Before I got to the room, which had my stuff, my aunt stopped me and told me to call my cousins to come down so I did. We all went to this one room that was full of baby toys, diapers, and a changing table, and the things to clean a baby. We were all in the room and my aunt said to Nick, "Climb on." I was thinking, "What is he doing?" So he climbed up and lay down. My aunt then got some diapers, baby powder, and some wipes. She started to put the diapers on him. After she was done with him he had on about 9 diapers on.
Then it was Chris's turn so she did the same thing to him. She noticed that I was watching very carefully, so after she was done, she said to me, "O.K Josh you're next." I then said, "For what?" and she said, "to be diapered". She said it was because so in case if I had an accident. So I agreed. Then, she started diapering me and it felt so good. When she was done with me, I too, had 9 diapers on.
So we went to bed, and in the morning, I noticed that I had peed in the diapers. So my aunt cleaned me up and put this time only 2 diapers on. When my mom got there, my diapers were soaked. My aunt changed me once more and I went home.
Then my next occurrence with diapers was when I was 12. I was at my best friend's house. His name is Kevin, and he has a hot sister. That night I slept over, and when I got there, he was just in a diaper. His sister told me to go to Kevin's room, so I did, with her right behind me. She then blindfolded me and told me to wait there, because she had a surprise for me. I couldn't wait to see what it was. After she came back I noticed that in her hands were diapers. She ordered me to lie down. She then took all my clothes off and put six diapers on me. Before she was done she pulled up a transparent plastic pant. She took my clothes and I was to play and go to the bathroom in my diaper.
The next day she gave me my clothes back and I was sent home. My third occurrence came when my friend and I were sleeping over my aunt's house. My friend wore baby diapers to bed, so when we went to bed she put 8 diapers on me and him. Now at 14, I tell my mom I'm going to the library on my bike, and instead I go to Safeway, and longs to buy my own diapers. I bring a backpack so no one will see I bought diapers.
This is a true story by a 14 year old.
My history by Eliah
I lived in Mexico City, so if I make some mistakes excuse me please. I started to use diapers at the age of 6 or 7; I really don't remember. The first time I used diapers was when I went to my grandmother's house and I asked her for a diaper because I wanted to know how does it feel, and she gave me one and I loved it so much that I couldn't stop using diapers since then. I came to my grandmother's house almost every week and every time I used to wear a diaper.
Later, at the age of 12 I started to buy diapers from the stores. The first time I did this was one time that I came to my grandmother's for a few days and there were no diapers in her house, so I went to the supermarket and bought some Huggies Pull-ups. This diaper was great and fit me a little tight but I wasn't complaining. When I arrived to my grandmother's house this day I put the Pull-ups on and I wore just this and a t-shirt so my aunt saw me and also my grandmother and my brothers, but I didn't care. Since then, everybody, including my parents, has known that I use diapers all the time. They know that and a few times they have talked to me, asking me if I needed diapers because I wet the bed or something like this, or just because I like that, and I told them that sometimes I needed diapers because I wet the bed. They asked me if I wanted to go to a doctor but I told them no, and they were okay until this moment with this.
I always wanted to be diapered by someone else, since my aunt diapered me when I was like 7 or 8. So one day I told my nanny that my mother wasn't at home and I needed a diaper change and that I can do it for my self, so I asked to help me. She said yes and changed my diaper. Since that day she changes me every time, of course without telling my mother, because my nanny thinks that my mother put my diapers on and she just helped me when I peed to avoid my mother punishing me. This is not true because my mother knew about my diapers, but she doesn't put me in the diapers herself.
My history by Adam
Back in the early 70's I was about 7 years old and had started wetting the bed. After putting up with it for some time my folks decided to see if something was wrong with me and I went to the doctor. After checking and testing, nothing could be found. After this had happened my mother and father sat down with me one night just as I was going to go to my room to get ready for bed and they talked with me about my bedwetting. They explained to me that they did not think I was wetting on purpose and that the doctor had found nothing wrong with me and so they had talked it over and decided that I should wear a diaper to bed so that I could have a good night's sleep and not wake up in a cold wet bed all the time.
This hit me like a rock and I pleaded with them not to make me wear a diaper and my folks stood firm and said that they thought it would be better if I did wear a diaper. With that, mom told me to go to the bathroom and brush my teeth and go to the bathroom. When that was done we went to my room, and as I walked into my room there on my bed were diapers, baby powder and what we called rubber pants; actually. they were vinyl plastic pants that mom had ordered through the mail so they would be large enough to fit me. Again, I pleaded to not have to wear diapers to bed and again my pleas fell on deaf ears. My dad had me get upon my bed and lie down and mom took the diapers folded them together to make a good thick pad to go between my legs. With this done she had me raise my butt and she slid the diapers underneath me and pulled down my underpants and took them off. Then she put baby powder on me so I wouldn't get a rash, pulled the diapers between my legs and pinned them at my waist. She then had me get off the bed and she took the rubber pants and held them open for me to step into, pulled them up my legs and into place over the diapers, making sure that I was tucked in so there would be no leaks. She helped me into my pj's and then into bed. She and dad gave me hugs and assured me I wasn't being bad because I wet my bed and that I would see that having a diaper in bed would make me more comfortable. I really didn't believe them and wanted nothing to do with having a diaper on. They left the room and after a long time I fell asleep. In the morning I woke up, the diapers were wet but the rubber pants had done their work and the bed stayed dry. Night diapers for me would last until age 10. Some mornings I would wake up and would be really wet but the rubber pants always kept my bed dry.
My Life Story by DD
Here's my life story in regards to diapers
I remember when I was 5 and my brother was 2. I would steal some of the pampers he wore and try to tape them on me but I guess I couldn't figure out how they worked so that was the end of that.
When I was 8, I took some attends that my old elementary school had for the handicapped children that went to the school. I remember staying late after school and when everyone was one, I would take them into the boys bathroom and get diapered in a stall. It felt so babyish and good but kind of scary! That went on for a while! I even faked sick to stay home a few times so that I could get to be in diapers all day. I also remember that when I was 10, I used a white garbage bag, wide masking tape, a roll of paper towels and a role of toilet paper and made my own home-made diaper. It was excellent but kind of baggy and it leaked. When I was 10.5 I bought my first pack of pampers to add to the above home made diaper which solved the leaking problem. When I was 11, I discovered what maxi-pads were used for and I used to take several from my mom's stash and make thin and efficient diapers out of them. when I was 12, I had enough guts to go and buy my first pack of depends. That was HEAVEN but they leaked a lot.
And of course I faked sick a lot of the time to stay home and be in diapers ALLLLLLL day long! That went on for a while still. Then, one day, while diapered in a home-made diaper, I had my first ejaculation quite by accident! I was frightened that I had 'broken' something and abandoned diapers for a while. After reading up on my anatomy and that this kind of thing was OK, I bought my first pack of Attends when I was 13. Now attends at the time had two tapes and a plastic liner and didn't hold much at all. That's when I discovered that double diapering was a viable option. I remember that when I was in grade 9, my brother was in grade 6 in a different school so that our march breaks ran a different times. I was able to spend one whole week being diapered every day, ALL day! I swear that I had to re-train myself near the end! So this went on for a while. Then when I was 16, I bought my first pacifier, baby bottle, diaper rash cream and baby wipes. Also, my mom had gotten a blanket sleeper (no feet) for herself from sears (SERIOUSLY!). I remember putting that thing on (it was a light baby blue) while wearing diapers and I really did look like a baby with my pacifier, stuffed teddy and baby bottle. I used to fill it with Kool-aid or apple juice and lie on the sofa or on a blanket on the floor and just be my baby self, feeling content, secure and happy. During this time I was having rather severe problems at school with people making threats on my life (for real), getting beat up all the time (the fact that I wear glasses and LOVE math and physics didn't help!). o, when I was 17 (grade 12) I dropped out a very depressed and suicidal 17 year old. To make matters worse, while I was on my "sabbatical", I used diapers but was caught by my mom who found my hiding place! It was game over for a while as I was shuttled from shrink to shrink to "cure" my deep depression. Fortunately every psych that I went to thought that my diapers were a result of my depression. So, to help myself and solve the entire mess, I went to a mental health center where I voluntarily spent 3 months sorting out my emotional mess. It was very nice there actually. Good food, great people, fucking idiot doctors though! So, in 3 months with NO medication I cured my depression (using special thinking and mind/meditation techniques that I read about) and at the same time I did my grade 12 advanced math by correspondence in one month. That's also the time when I took up scuba diving and found a heart-felt love for the ocean. However, at the mental health center, they had a geriatric section. And, as you can guess, they had diapers (cloth) AND rubber pants! COOL! I thought! So I used those a number of times and NEVER got caught! They were medi-pants made in Sweden. Very absorbent but a totally ugly green color. Worse than depends! I would take my wet/dirty diapers when I was done and sneak them into the outgoing laundry bin and take new, clean ones from the incoming laundry bin. Then after I left Homewood I didn't do diapers for like 1.5 years. (I know, awful eh!?) That takes me to 18.5 when I broke my no-diaper spell and bought a pack of attends which I didn't finish and threw out on fear of discovery. I left diapers again for a while and picked it up again when I was 19 but we were renovating at the time so I was afraid of getting caught. When I had just turned 20 (may 22 of this year) I got the job offer to start in June from one of Canada's largest Internet providers. There I became a beta tester for their software and that's when I found alt.sex.fetish.diapers and all the web AB stuff including #DPF on IRC. That was also the time when I read my first issue of Aquacorp journal (very high-tech diving mag). It featured a 12 page article on toileting problems that tech divers have while spending 8 or 9 hours underwater. It featured a lengthy review of diapers, their use, catheters and the issue of defecation. After all was said and done, the panel of experts decided that diapers are the best method. COOL! I though. Now everything is coming together! Just 3 months ago I bought a pack of attends and nearly finished them but I tossed the rest since my hiding place was in jeopardy of being discovered! (This house has like no place hide ANYTHING! AAAUUGGHH!!) That takes me to now. Meeting you, enjoying the company of people on #DPF, webbing to new sites for pictures, fantasizing about being in diapers with someone else who actually accepts it and doesn't mind one bit, etc. There is not ONE night that goes by where I don't dream, or fantasize about diapers. I LOVE diapers. They make me feel secure, safe, warm, comfortable, giggly, sensual, happy, babyish and at peace with everything out there. All the problems of the world disappear when I'm in diapers. It's a feeling that words can not explain.
Well, there ya go. Anything you read should go to your grave with you.
I hope that gives you a better understanding about where I come from in terms of diapers and AB.
I'm not really sure how it began. I was a "late bloomer" got out diapers late (sort of), started school late. I had problems in school because it was discovered that I had dyslexia. I was "babied" by my mom a lot when I was younger. I believe that to be the main reason, but I not totally sure.
I was never really caught in the act of wearing diapers, my mother would find my stash of diapers. She never really allow me to have any personal space, so had to hide them somewhere else in the house besides my bedroom, but she would eventually find them sometimes. That was never a good experience, she'd get really mad, I would just shut up and play dumb.
I think after she found some soiled diapers she decided to get me some help. I don't really remember how everything went exactly, it was a long time ago. I think I stopped for a while, I was around 9 or 10 or younger, I don't really remember.
Another close call happen when my parents went on a long vacation and we (me and my two sisters, more on them later) had a cousin "baby sit" us. At that time I was back to sneaking into diapers when I could. I found that the Sears catalog carried adult diapers, so I would order them. I had to wait by the phone a lot because the would call when the order was in. I would "intercept" any calls, until I got the "one". Then I would ride my bike (13-14 years old) over to Sears to pick up my order of diapers. Man, they wear the best diapers, thick, really baby-like. Unfortunately they stop making that style a few years later. Back to the close call, while my parents were gone I was planning on wearing diapers, a lot. So I order some before they left, so they come in as soon as they were gone. Unfortunately the baby-sitter got the call from Sears about the order being in. I saw her put my diapers in my parents room. She didn't ask us about them, so I took a few. Then my parents were due home, so I got rid of the rest of them. I thought everything would be cool, until my cousin mention them to my mom. I was confronted again, played dumb again, there was no evidence of them. That made her really mad again and very suspicious. I thought I was in the clear. A few other close calls happen, but she seemed not to pay much attention to it. I thought she gave up. Until I was older still (18-19) I started wearing depends or attends (I can't remember which one, but they were a lot thicker back then) I was "pushing it" with wearing diaper, I would be wearing diapers (usually wet or soiled or both) out of the house to go do things.
Like once I went to a movie in soiled diaper (I used lot's of deodorizer to help cover the smell up), lucky the
theater was one of those low, low budget one, mostly empty and the people that were there were mostly old "smelly" people anywise (they were probably in diapers too).
That was a rush, but I never did it again. I am always afraid being discovered, though it's also one of my fantasy's. I also went skiing in diapers too, (I also love to ski) It was a dead night at a local "hill" (more like ant-hill)
That too was a rush ! Another thing I did was to take pictures of me in my diapers, though I would purposely cut my head off from the shot, I didn't want anyone to see my face when I had them developed. Well, my mother found the pictures, really, really this time. Here I thought she gave up, but she was just waiting for some good evidence. She wanted me to go for some "help", (I guess when I was younger and went from some "help" I was too young and they thought it was a phase. Instead they help me with my dyslexia I mean dyslexia.) This caused a lot of "heat" at home, which made long for being a little kid again even more. So a couple of years later I moved out. But right around this time I also found my "soul mate" of sorts (my girlfriend) I gave up wearing diapers more and more. I nearly lost her when she found one of my old pics, that was hard to explain. In fact I never really did.. But she let it go, This was still before I discovered the cyber-world of diaper wearers.. Boy this is getting long... Oh, before I forget, my sisters. Well, I have two sisters, one a few year older, and the other 2 years younger. I think I did a good job of hiding from them, I they knew anything they didn't let on, which was good for me.
I went to a local college, so stayed at home, my sisters went away to school. My older sister got married right after college and moved away. My younger sister went to England for a year right after college, then moved out when she got home.
So for a large part of my teenage and young adult diaper wearing days I didn't see much of my sisters, which made wearing diapers a lot easier.
Boy, this is strange, we do have a lot of similar experiences and circumstances. But one difference, you still get to enjoy wearing diaper regularly.
The good old diaper days are more or less behind me now. I live with my girlfriend now, we are planning on getting married next year. I once in a great while I'm able to sneak into diapers for a while, but not as often as I would like. But I not going to give up everything I have now just to go back to being able to wear diapers when ever I want. What a paradox.
I have a couple of different fantasies. One is that my mom finds me in my messy diapers and lets me stay in diaper a babies me (I guess that goes back to the childhood thing)
Another would be playing with a diapered friend, go out and doing things in diapers or finding another "baby" with a mommy (real or fake) who would baby us. (I guess it comes from finding out that other people like to do the same thing I do) well, I got to get back to work, hope to hear from you again and answer any more questions.
I was 6 years old when I was caught by my mother stealing cloth diapers from the neighbor across the street, She told me that if I would have told her about my desire to be diapered and treated like a baby she would have understood. Then she told me she was taking me shopping for my own baby things so I didn't have to steal them from other people and that as punishment for stealing from our neighbor I would be in diapers for the rest of the summer. Then she said if we were going shopping for baby things, I would need to be dressed properly and asked me to get the diapers I had stolen. When I did she told me to lie down on the bed. In one quick motion she removed my shorts and underwear. She folded the 21"x40" cloth baby diapers so they would fit me and proceeded to pin them on me tightly at the waist with little ducky diaper pins. When she was done she told me to go wait for her on the couch. I asked about my shorts and she told me that if I was going to be in diapers for the summer she thought everyone should know that I was back in baby diapers and being treated just like a baby. I felt so humiliated and thought it could not get any worse. I was wrong. As I sat and waited for my mother, she got on the phone and called my sister who was visiting a friend from school. My sister was ten years old. Mom talked to her and told about my stealing cloth diapers and about my present predicament and asked if she would like to go with us to help pick out some baby things for the "New Baby". My sister said that she would love to and asked if her friend Lisa could come along. Mom said the more the merrier and that we would wait for them. In about ten minutes my sister and Lisa came into the living room and spotted me sitting on the couch in just my T shirt tennis shoes and cloth baby diapers. They both started laughing and Lisa said she thought I looked very cute in diapers and that she had never had a baby brother and was jealous of my sister. Lisa sat beside me on the couch and lifted my shirt so she could get a better look at my diaper. She patted the front of my diaper and asked if I felt like a baby and would I wet my diaper soon so she could watch. I just looked away in humiliation and said I didn't know. My mom said that as long as I was in diapers like a baby I was going to use them just like a baby does.
After some more laughter from the girls mom said it was time to get going so we went outside with mom dragging me by the hand. The car was parked on the street out front and I was sure the neighbor kids would see me. When we got to the car Lisa asked if she could hold the baby in her lap on the way to the store. It was about a twenty minute drive to the store and the whole way there Lisa was feeling the front of my diaper and talking soothing baby talk to me and asking questions like "Did I like to wear diapers?" "Was I embarrassed to be out in public with just my diapers?" and "Would I like for her to change my diaper after I wet it?" I could not believe what was happening. I so humiliated that I could not answer but I did feel something strange going on between my legs. I had a very hard erection. Lisa also noticed and patted my diaper again and told me it was all right and that I probably would enjoy having her change my wet diaper.
When we arrived at the store mom put me in a stroller and strapped me in like you would a baby. She then pulled my T-shirt up so everyone could plainly see that I was wearing cloth diapers. I started to cry and mom told me to stop or she would pull my diapers down in the middle of the store and spank my bare bottom. I stopped crying and we all went to the "Infant" section and my mom and the girls had a lot of fun picking out baby things for me. Mom picked up three dozen of the 21"x40" Curity cloth diapers and eight pairs of plastic baby pants. Some were clear some were blue and some had little baby designs on them. She also got some baby bottles, pacifiers, baby powder, different fancy diaper pins and seven baby bibs with different sayings like "Mommies Little Baby" and "I Love My Mommy". My sister and her friend were picking out things like baby toys, rattles, some toddler size T shirts with infantile sayings and designs on them. Everyone was laughing and having a good time except me. Some people would stop to what the commotion was about and after they say me in my diapers sitting in a baby stroller they would join in the laughter and teasing. When all my new baby things were put in the shopping cart we finally went to pay for them. I was pleased to get out of there and end my humiliation but I was in for a horrible surprise. As we were leaving the store Lisa noticed that they were having a sale on baby photos and thought it would quite appropriate and so much fun if they had some baby pictures taken of me while we were there. I tried to protest but mom shoved one of my new pacifiers in my mouth and told me not to talk unless asked to speak and then only in baby talk. The next thing I knew my mother sent my sister and Lisa over to the refreshment area of the store to ask them to fill one of my baby bottles with warm milk while she talked to the photographer off to the side. I heard them both laugh and mom came back over and said that it was all arranged and that I was not to cry or complain or things would get even worse. I didn't think they could but I did not want to find out so I just stayed quiet. Mom checked my diaper and found that my diapers were wet. I guess in all the confusion and upset I had not noticed that I had wet my diaper. Now I really felt like a baby and was beginning to think that it was better that I be put back in diapers like a baby. Mom declared to everyone else there that I could not have my baby pictures taken in a wet diaper and then she pulled out a changing pad from one of the bags and laid it on the floor right there in front of everyone. She released me from the stroller picked me up and laid me down on the vinyl pad. As mom was removing my wet diaper she looked around and saw two other boys sitting there about my age. She asked them if they had ever seen a 6-year-old baby who still needed his diapers changed by his mommy. They just shook their heads "NO" and stared in disbelief at what they saw. Mom finished diapering me and took out one of the baby bibs that said "Mommy's Little Baby" open it and, with a marker, scratched out the word "Little" and wrote the word "BIG" so everyone would know that I was a BIG baby. About this time my sister and Lisa came back with my baby bottle full of warm milk. Lisa asked if she could feed the baby so while the photographer was setting up for the pictures I was placed on Lisa's lap as she pushed the nipple into my mouth. I began to drink almost instinctively and that funny feeling between my legs started again. I just lay there as Lisa nursed me from my bottle, with one hand holding the bottle and the other softly but firmly patting the front of my fresh dry diaper. I can't explain the feeling but I knew that it was making very happy. When the photographer was ready he had me come up to the set and sit down with some baby blocks and a choo-choo train. He made sure that my cloth baby diapers and little ducky diaper pins were completely visible and began shooting pictures. Then he had me lie down and drink from my baby bottle and kick my feet in the air just like babies do. I did everything he asked me to do so that I could get out of there as soon as possible. When it was all over we got back in the car and headed home and I was planted firmly on Lisa's lap all the way.
For the rest of the summer I was kept in cloth diapers and baby pants. Mom made no effort to hide my diapers from other people in fact she took every opportunity she could to humiliate me and let everyone know that I was being treated like a baby and that I was back in diapers for a long time. Lisa came by our house quite a bit that summer and always wanted to see "Baby Ricky" and take me for walks to the park where she would feed me from a baby bottle while stoking the front of my diaper and then changing my wet diapers right there in front of the other kids and their parents. She would scold me so the others could hear about being six years old and still wearing and wetting my diapers like a baby. I really enjoyed that summer and say allot of Lisa for the next few years as she continued her babying of me. She would always say "If you are going to act like a baby, then I will keep you in diapers and treat you like a baby..." But that is another story.
Peter, Waking Up Wet
This is a story based on memories of many wet mornings . I was 10 years old and small for my age. I also had asthma and allergies from the time I was 7 and had gotten used to the many accidents resulting in wet pants because of my medications. Now waking up in a wet diaper and plastic pants was normal.
I remember one of the first times I wet my pants while playing outside. I was so absorbed by the imaginary highway I was building in the dirt I forgot I needed to pee. My mother was enjoying talking with a couple of women friends over coffee. I scrambled to get to the bathroom frantically trying to pull open the screen door that always got stuck. I burst into tears as a wet spot spread on my pants and a puddle grew under me on the concrete steps.
My mother and the other ladies were watching and grinning at my predicament and my wet pants. I kept trying to open the door as my mother and her friend Jane came over and took me inside. "Let's get you inside and into some dry pants, Droopy Drawers." Still whimpering, I said, "I couldn't hold it and the stupid door got stuck." "Well, I will get Daddy to fix it one of these days but till then you need to pay more attention to when you need to go potty." My mother still used baby words when she talked to me sometimes.
She was still talking to Jane as she sat me down on the bathroom floor and started to untie my shoes. Jane lived down the street from us and had two children. Michael was six and Amy was three and still in diapers so she was used to changing children after accidents, but not as old as me. "Can I help?" she asked my mother. "Oh yes thank you. I should have known this would happen." Its all right", Jane said smiling, "Accidents happen.". "I guess you went through this already with Michael.", my mother said. Jane replied, "Some kids just take longer than others to learn how to stay dry."
By this time my mother had my shoes and socks off and asked Jane to get her a wet wash cloth as she laid me down on the floor. My mother left the room for a second and brought back two diapers, plastic pants and some diaper pins in her mouth. She took the pins out and said to Jane "I should have done this earlier.". Jane stood over me as my mother knelt down and quickly pulled my wet pants off. She took the washcloth from Jane as she lifted me up by my ankles and cleaned me up. Then she slipped the diaper under my bottom and quickly pinned it on. Jane handed my mother the plastic pants and said to me, "You certainly are a good little boy not to wiggle, Patrick. Amy wiggles all over the place when I change her diaper." My mother pulled the plastic pants up my legs and stood me up patting my bottom saying, "There, all nice and dry." I asked her, " Where are my pants?" "They are all dirty, and besides, you don't need any. Go outside and play," she replied. I felt like a toddler and looked like one too standing there in just a diaper, plastic pants and a T shirt.
At this time in my life it was not unusual for my mother to treat me like a toddler sometimes especially when we were around other women with children. There were lots of kids in my neighborhood were all at least two years younger than I. My mother never made it a secret that she still kept me in diapers whenever the topic mothers talked about over coffee turned to potty training or diapers. Most families had at least one child in diapers and the mothers knew I still wore diapers and all of them had changed me at least once.
Whenever we went to visit friends or relatives my mother always packed a full diaper bag in case I wet my pants or we were spending the night anywhere. Shopping at Christmas in the big malls was always a stressful time that I was in diapers till I was 12 years old. My mother always said she didn't want to worry about trying to find a bathroom for me while we were shopping. More often than not she would ask me if it was wet or needed my diaper changed. That was always extremely humiliating to me because she would ask me wherever we were even if people were around.
If I was wet she would try to find a women's lounge that wasn't too busy to change me in. She liked shopping at Macy's and they had a big couch in the front of the bathrooms. It was just inside the door though so anyone coming in would have to walk past as my wet diaper was exposed and I was laying there like a toddler. One time a woman came in with her two daughters just as my mother was slipping a dry diaper under my bottom. The girls were four and seven years old and giggled at me with my legs up in the air. Their mother commented to mine as she held her girl's hands and watched as my mother took one diaper pin out of her mouth and started to pin my diaper on.
"It sure is a lot of work with a little one still in diapers. Thank goodness Carie was potty trained by the time she was three.". Taking the other diaper pin from her mouth my mother said, " Boy, I know what you mean. Patrick still has too many accidents and I still can't trust him to stay dry." Then she asked the woman if she could get my plastic pants from the diaper bag. The woman said sure and handed my white plastic pants to my mother as she pinned the other side of my diaper. This was too embarrassing for me but all I could do was turn my head to the wall so I wouldn't have to look at anyone while my mother slid my plastic pants on and pulled my corduroy pants back up.
One year my parents went on vacation for two weeks in May and I stayed with my Aunt Melissa and my cousins for two weeks. I was still in school and in the 5th grade. I really liked staying at my aunts because I could be little again. My Aunt Melissa had two toddlers who were both still in diapers. She was trying to potty train them and was looking forward to the day they were out of diapers. When I went to her house I was usually treated just like a three year old.